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Who should I sue in a defamation of character case

The person to sue is the employer.

Firstly, they have the money.

Secondly, the CHOSE to accept whatever lies were said about you. or they twisted the so called evidence and deemed it proof.

If a company has a procedure that says (you may not ask a woman for a date twice) the company may enforce its procedures (as long as they do so consistently). But does breach of this procedure constitute what most people would consider harassment?

Also, you may not even know who lied about you.

Remember, the woman may not have made her statements with malice, and the company, in choosing to believe her, is acting on their choice to believe her. They did not have to believe her.

So, sue the employer.